Category Archives: Humor

My Life as a Turkey (really)

Apropos of the holiday, I thought I’d share a curious life-changing experience I had this year with respect to (you got it) turkeys. For some reason, a number of large wild turkey mamas decided to use my place to feed … Continue reading

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How Extravagant! My Christmas Present to Myself! Everything My Hero Ever Wrote!

[an “aside” in a stage whisper:] “When I get a little money I buy books; and if any is left I buy food and clothes.”–Erasmus, 1469-1536 Mark Twain is the funniest, most original, wholly American literary genius this country has … Continue reading

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Hibiscus Christmas: A Child’s Christmas in Florida

(c) Copyright 2014, Margaret Langstaff, All rights reserved [I don’t know if this is kosher or cool to re-post an oldie like this, but it still speaks volumes to me and suggests pretty clearly what a weirdly different place Florida … Continue reading

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“Thanks!” Let’s Mean It When We Say It!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING, GUYS! A wee bit of social criticism on our Thanksgiving customs from a renowned poet– “Thanks” W. S. Merwin, 1927 Listen with the night falling we are saying thank you we are stopping on the bridges to bow … Continue reading

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Apropos of Byron (previous post) and his Romancing …

What woman could withstand the following blandishments and adulation? [ Byron did, after all, write an epic poem about Don Juan (considered his masterpiece)–and no one challenged his qualifications to speak with authority on Don Juan, either ;)] But back … Continue reading

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Byron’s House Party – from A COUNTRY HOUSE COMPANION

“The most flamboyant and notorious of the major Romantics, George Gordon, Lord Byron, was likewise the most fashionable poet of the day.“–THE POETRY FOUNDATION ____________________ I lost a whole day rediscovering with delight a wonderful, funny and revealing book on … Continue reading

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Poetry Dare – Can You Poetaster Wags Rise to the Occasion?

I found this in a box of antique ephemera today.  It’s for the old timey 18th-19th century binocular viewer, stereopticon thingy or something. One inserted it and voila! a 3-D tableau of a camel caravan headed for Egypt right before … Continue reading

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Word Crimes – “The Movie” Cute, Clever!

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The Scoop, The Dish – “Twilight’s Indian Princess”

FREE BOOK PROMOTION FOR THIS TITLE JULY 1 – 5 Amazon link http://www.amazon.com/Twilights-Indian-Princess-Margaret-Langstaff-ebook/dp/B00L9Q1TC2/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1403836553&sr=1-1&keywords=twilights+indian+princess _______________ About the Book Briefly, it’s Literary with a Southern flavor. It has a lovable daft heroine who can’t get out of her own way. She is … Continue reading

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Sometimes It’s Hard to Get Any Work Done Around Here

Riley’s tongue merged with my lips in this photo (his intention surely), and my lips are not a threat to Angela Jolie, I promise you, but you get the picture.  I’ve mentioned elsewhere that I live on a small farm … Continue reading

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BOOKS AS WIDGETS?

BOOKS AS WIDGETS?  For the price of a sandwich?  (A short excerpt fm an essay from the New Yorker) “Afterward, [after meeting Bezos] Doeren told his partner at Rainy Day Books, “I just met the world’s biggest snake-oil salesman. It’s … Continue reading

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My Inner Turkey

God got tired of animal sacrifices and “burnt offerings” ages ago (Psalms 40:6) and yet somehow we still haven’t gotten the message. This is a post-Thanksgiving “post” to assuage my after-the-fact, raging guilt over having yet again stuffed myself silly and had … Continue reading

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“Of the Making of Books There Is No End”

Of the making of books there is no end, and too much study is wearisome to the flesh. –ECCLESIASTES 12:12 NKJ Love this photo and thought you might appreciate it too. Don’t know who shot it, but I wish I … Continue reading

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Art Is Not for Everybody

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A Rare and Precious Gift – “What’s So Funny” Part Two

“Humor has in it a liberating element … “It refuses to be hurt by the arrows of reality or to be compelled to suffer. It insists that it is impervious to the wounds dealt by the outside world, that these … Continue reading

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The Rigors of Writing and The Shocking Plunge into Reality

Though I still have my hair and teeth, I can attest to the truth of O’Connor’s ballsy statement. I would  add that The Plunge into Reality is also often highly disruptive, can make a mess of the rest of one’s life, … Continue reading

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Finally! A Tutorial for Book Busters and Writer Biters!

[Just have to pass this on] Attn.:  Book Trolls, Author Flamers Running out of helpless, vulnerable life forms to torment? Can’t get a rise outta any old author anywhere anymore? Check it out, you vermin and varlets– 14 Ways to Tick Off … Continue reading

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What’s So Funny?

     Neuroscientists Think (?) They’ve Nailed Laughter–NY Times I wonder what Mark Twain or Woody Allen or David Sedaris (even) would make of this recent NY Times piece.  Would that I could get their reactions. Endorphins!  The source of the pleasure … Continue reading

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Skeered to Death! The Headless Horseman Rides Again!

     It never fails, every October, in advance of Halloween, I think of this nightmarish freak featured so prominently in Washington Irving‘s timeless tale THE LEGEND OF SLEEPY HOLLOW. What a rip roaring hair-raising tale for kids of all ages … Continue reading

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The Universe According to Sarah Jo McCorkle of Viburnum Lane

TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN (e.g., anything with a pulse on this planet) A Matter of Ultimate Significance A Major Advancement in Human Knowledge  *S*H*O*C*K*I*N*G Paradigm Shift `Coming Soon from CHP   The Viburnum Lane Bubble Bath Hypothesis & The New … Continue reading

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A Lagniappe for Readers – “The Unbearable Lightness of Prunes”

For my few stalwart, long-suffering and die-hard literati readers who have been too impecunious to purchase one of my books or stories just yet, here is some news you can use (as you wish). My narcoleptic publisher has roused from … Continue reading

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Flannery O’Connor “My Dear God”

Followers of this blog who have taken the trouble to wade through my whimsical though approximately accurate “About” page will have discovered that I am a great admirer of the short stories and novels of Flannery O’Connor.  We are co-religionists … Continue reading

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Happy Roald Dahl Day! Hurray!

Originally posted on Harriet & dee:
Today, 13th September (which just so happens to be a Friday. Unlucky for some, but not me, all my days are full of lots of luck and loveliness) is Roald Dahl Day! On what…

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“This book will part your hair”

Here in the dubious off-kilter state of Florida, it’s coming on “the season.” Those clued into what that means notice their hair stands on end with more alacrity than is usual at NOAA news of happenings (waves, depressions, rotations) as … Continue reading

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Love Fled

The creative person’s life is full of bunny trails, astonishments/surprises (most pulled off by the powerful imagination which hides out, resides in the murk of the unconscious.  It will not be thwarted; it will prevail.). One thing leads to another.  … Continue reading

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Under the Bo Tree

I am a sometime artist (although I always think of myself as primarily a writer), and I  was rifling through some boxes of prints and stuff today looking for a pen and ink drawing I did of another author some years … Continue reading

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Show Off Your Love For Public Radio With These NPR Temporary Tattoos

hilarious

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Name That Chick

I have been scarce around here because of 1) weather related events (featuring falling trees and tree frogs)  2) a contretemps with a “publicity consultant” 3) a nuclear war with my husband  (he lost as far as I am concerned, … Continue reading

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Charming Paintings of Vintage Books That Smoke, Drink, and Slip on Banana Peels

I’ve imagined these … and bet other writers have too but the images were hardly as whimsical and wonderful as these …  What fun these illustrations are ….

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This just in from Amazon–“Margaret Langstaff, A customer just told us your review helped them shop for DEPRAVED AND INSULTING ENGLISH”

Hahahaha… glad to be of help. “To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield”  … even an inch to Bescumblers, Pizzles et al. When life has become alothen, this is a good alternative to allochezia. And an anodyne for … Continue reading

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Bile Assaults: is bile really that bad?

Originally posted on Delight Through Logical Misery:
The four types of temperament proposed by humorism. Or how nobody has ever looked ever. Something had me thinking about bile recently. I can’t be sure what it was and I wouldn’t want…

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“’Dear Patron:’ A Savage Terrorist Attack on the Weakest Most Vulnerable Members of Western Civilization, Book Critics!”

[NOTE AND BACKGROUNDER: This is a slightly edited version—for reasons of privacy only—of a real  email a colleague of mine received recently.  Identifiers, names, addresses, urls etc. have been X’ed out.  Book Critics (sullied by some recurrent craven disreputable yellow-bellied … Continue reading

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Pity the Poor Tortured Writers?

In a very amusing piece  “Is Writing Torture?”  the New Yorker covers the recent dust-up over the travails of the writing life among three of the unlikeliest writers ever to engage in mutual conversation, let alone a serious discussion, among … Continue reading

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The Dead Goat Scrolls and–You!

(c) Copyright 2013, Margaret Langstaff All Rights Reserved  Is This Your Lucky Day? Allow me to amplify and explain. This book  (the one above with the wingnut-eared goat on the cover) could change your life!  And mine too, for that … Continue reading

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The Assault of Laughter

(c) Copyright 2013, Margaret Langstaff All Rights Reserved As with an unfortunate minority of similarly wired souls, winter is always a down time for me. The gloom, the shorter days, the cold. They drain me utterly and I have to … Continue reading

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LOOK! It’s a Bird, It’s a Plane … No! It’s

A flock of Sandhill Cranes! As I was sitting outside under an oak tree yesterday minding my own business and fully absorbed in re-reading The Hobbit, gently (even affectionately) turning the yellowed pages of my old paperback edition, I became … Continue reading

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